Considering Decisions

by Sandra Dodd

Life is FULL of decisions, right?

Some people say no. Some people decided a long time to close their windows and thoughts and... wait. I wrote "Some people decided..." without even noticing.

When unschoolers discuss a vast array of choices, it seems inevitable that newer people will come by and assure us we're full of it. People have to do things, they say. They have to do what they have to do. People can't go around choosing from everything in the whole wide world, because the world isn't that way. Kids need to learn now that they have to live with their lack of choices.

How often do you make a choice?
How often do you think "I have no choice"?

How do decisions happen?
How small a decision can you make?
            to pause?
            to smile?
            to sign your name bigger and happier?
            to open your windows and your thoughts?

We have days full of togetherness, and a life full of peace. We live in a world full of ideas, and each has a mind full of possibilities.

My children are mindful, thoughtful, aware and conscious of the choices they make.

Life is full of decisions.

In April 2013, in a discussion about food, and about parents eating without thinking, I wrote:
Every choice you make should be made consciously, thoughtfully, for real and good reasons.
Robin Bentley replied:
I just had a lightbulb moment. I've definitely made conscious choices in how I parent and partner with my daughter (not always, as I can still fall into automatic responses when I'm tired or stressed). *BUT* I haven't done it that much with my own self.

It seems that lots of what I do is reactionary when it comes to *me*. I will do, eat, say, even think things on a whim or in defiance (of what or whom at this stage, I can only guess), *without* considered thought or making a conscious choice.

Wow. The things you learn when you read here!

The discussion, if it's still there: (on facebook)

Robin Bentley wrote in May 2017:
This is thoughtful. And funny. And sweet.


It's a scroll-down comic about how difficult it can be to change one's beliefs and why.

Unschooling is dependent on seeing things differently. Deschooling is about dismantling some beliefs and assumptions, so that link might help.